Thursday, July 07, 2011

George On Golf


Greetings All,

I was out golfing the other day with David Budzak (original Harlequin drummer) and AJ Chabidon (current Harlequin drummer) and ironically, an original roadie (Bob Robinson).
It was a very relaxed outing as we are all comfortable in each others presence due to our years of acquaintance and frankly, the soothing effects of just the right amount of alcohol! We also send out the odd “smoke signal” to the mosquito population warning them our blood is no good to them. We do like to have fun and don’t take ourselves too seriously as athletes.
There are only a handful of sports that can be played while consuming alcohol and I dare say … I enjoy them all! Pool, bowling, curling, darts and softball. Don’t get the wrong idea …I’m not a hopeless drunk but rather I’m a casual imbiber. I like to temper my intake with a little physical activity so as to maintain a certain balance … on my feet…
It was a beautiful day, about 23 degrees, a slight breeze working to our advantage on most holes and just enough cloud cover to keep those nasty UV rays from causing us any more wrinkles.
Golf is all about camaraderie, sportsmanship, and the pleasure telling of lies, jokes and in our case … road stories. It is also a great place to vent about your life away from those all seeing and all hearing … spouses!!
My wife understands that the safety valve needs releasing on a regular basis and let’s me golf anytime I wish … excluding her birthday which … Thank God … is in February. I always come home in a great mood which she appreciates.
I started out the day with a par as did Bob who was riding with me. We high-fived each other and smirked at AJ and Dave who share much in common: they both play drums, they’re both lefties and they both … started with bogies.
The next hole was a Par 5 and it is Dave’s nemesis! He always starts out by telling us how much he hates this hole. So naturally … he double bogied it. The rest of us got pars.
On the par threes… which the next hole was … we play closest to the hole for “Twoonies”,… but you have to make the par in order to collect or it’s a carry over.
You can also collect a “twoonie” for a birdie regardless if you made the green or not. It is possible to do both and really cash in! lol
AJ was bemoaning the fact that he’d left his “Aiming Juice” at home. We usually enjoy a little snort from his hip flask on the first par 3. It is, we’re told, an old Scottish tradition that began at the turn of the century to ward off the effects of the cold coastal winds at St. Andrews. Truth or not … we don’t care, we just enjoy!
I managed to collect six dollars on this hole but this was to be my only shining moment of the day.
The next hole is normally a par four but due to a deluge the previous night the tees were moved up and the hole became a par three. Nobody won that hole so it became a carry over.
I’m not going to bore you with a play by play description of the whole day but the real reason for writing this blog was to inform you all that not only did we have a great time but I dare say, we all had one of the best games of our lives!!
AJ had an exceptional day! On the #7 par 5 he managed to put his drive out about 265 yards but it caught the tall grass at the edge of the fairway. His second shot was a monster that put him about 14 feet from the whole. He then blew our minds with an EAGLE putt!
The cart girl happened to waiting for us to come off the green and AJ was cajoled into buying a round for the boys. I think there are permanent creases in AJ’s cheeks from the grin that never left his face for the remainder of the day and possibly the entire week.
If that wasn’t enough … he then proceeded to win a triple carry over with a BIRDIE! Kafriggenching …8 bucks apiece from each of us and bragging rights for life.
Every year we get together for what we call “The Fall Classic” which consists of three days (Friday, Saturday and Sunday) at an undisclosed cabin which is located near 3 gorgeous golf courses. Some of us go out on the Thursday evening to set things up.
We usually get thousands of old range balls from a connection we have and drive those puppies into the lake from the shoreline before we set out to play. We also have pellet rifles for target practice and a ski boat as well as a small paddle boat you can be put in if you pass out.
In the evenings we enjoy copious amounts of protein and hops.
Then it’s poker time.
Last year I brought a copy of “Walk Hard: The Dewey Cox Story” which is in my opinion even a better spoof on the music industry than Spinal Tap.
Our sides were aching the next day but in spite of that I will put forth a motion that we watch it again this fall.
I guess AJ will be talked about at The Fall Classic as a legend has been created. The Eagle has landed and I can only hope the Eagle only flies on Fridays!


Have a great summer!
George